Jesus, you stilled the storm

He was in such pain. His voice mail message this evening was tired and with a quiet urgency I could hear in his voice, he asked for me to return the call as soon as I could. He had, "something to share with me." I did not hear his incoming call. I had my grandson with me in the car when the message arrived and was taking him to a basketball season ending team party. Once I arrived at the party location with my grandson, got him settled in with his friends and their pizza, I saw the voice mail message. I stepped out of the room to return the call.

My friend was quiet when I asked how he was doing. I could hear his pain as he searched for the words he would use. He lives far, far away, but he needed to talk with an old friend and he chose me. I waited patiently for him to speak and then he shared that his wife had just been checked into a hospital after trying to kill herself. He didn't know who else to call. I listened, sharing just the presence he sought without trying to fix anything. How could I?

I asked whether he needed me to come there, and he said "No."

I asked him if there was anything he needed me to do for him. He said, "No, just don't tell [mutual friends and his sister]. I'm not ready for them to know."

I said "OK." Then more silence. He just needed to be connected with someone else in his pain.

He asked what the children's voices were he was overhearing, and I explained that I was at a now raucous kid's pizza party. He laughed and said he wished he could be here. I said I wish he could too. I offered to have a pizza delivered directly to him and hold the phone up so he could join the party "virtually." He chuckled and said that wouldn't be necessary. The contrast of his pain and the children's unbridled joy was powerful.

He said the hospital would not let him see his wife except for one hour each morning and afternoon for the next several days while they assessed her condition, and then he began to well up again. His soul mate was in unimaginable pain and he could not be with her.

He said he needed to go and just thanked me for being there. He said he would call me tomorrow. I said he and his wife and their son would be in my prayers.

When I got home I emailed him a short prayer that I often use in my own times of pain and distress. And I prayed for him, for his wife and for their son, that they might find peace in this time of terrible pain. I offer to you the prayer I sent him. Some of you have seen or heard it before, but I ask you to accept this gift in his name and add my friend, his wife and their son to your prayer list. At his request, I cannot share with you their names, but God knows who they are.

Jesus, you stilled the storm
and walked to your friends across turbulent waters,
saying to them, "Take heart."

Help me not to lose courage in this rough weather
and always to remember
that this same ocean that tosses my little boat,
and makes such fearful rowing,
bears me up.